


Take My Hand & Don't Let Go

by Aira_Loves_Herself



Series: My Hwii Series~ [5]
Category: Stray Kids (Band), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Badass Somi, Caregiver! Chan, Caregiver! Somi, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, I Suck At Happy Endings, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Lee Daehwi-centric, Little Space, Little! Daehwi, M/M, Non-Sexual Age Play, References to Depression, Self-Harm, Stray Kids adopt Daehwi, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Wanna One are mean, but it gets better, lame ending, really - Freeform, save the poor child
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-27
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2019-10-16 13:22:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17550494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aira_Loves_Herself/pseuds/Aira_Loves_Herself
Summary: What happens when your bandmate brings home another band's bandmate back to your dormBUTSaid other group's bandmate nearly succeeded committing suicide_Wanna One are Assholes, Chan and Somi are about to THROW HANDS, Felix may have got whipped, Daehwi needs love_This world needs more Daehwi-centric





	1. Chapter 1

Chan likes to think he's ready for everything and anything, cook for 9? Done

Compose a song in a day? Hard but he'll pull through and manage it.

But the Australian was definitely _not ready at all_ to face what was waiting on the other side of the door when he had gone over to open it after hearing soft knocks.

Felix with his face ghostly pale, glassy eyes staring at him begging for help and in the boy's arms carried a boy with dark greyish hair sleeping soundly.

He had a facemask and eyes are shut tight, but Chan recognize that face

_Anywhere_

"Felix! Wh-what the-? What happened?" But he _knows_ , he knows exactly what happened but he couldn't help but hope that the younger bandmate of his would tell him a different tale.

"H-He tried to j-ju-jump of-off t-that buil-ding w-we s-some-time ha-hang out at"

 _fuck fuck FUCK_ , Chan feels his head starts to spin, _he did it again, he nearly succeed this time, HE NEARLY DIED!!_

"H-hyung.... hyung?" But Chan is crying, he can't believe this was happening again and if it weren't for Felix............he'll need to attend a funeral.

"B-bring him in and p-put him in my room, just let me.... ugh" Felix, still terrified, walk towards the leader's shared room.

Chan starts to mind his own breathing, _in out in out calm down, he's alive, Felix saved him, he's......alive_.

He only wants a few moments to recollect himself. It's been years, he was so sure back then, that _**he**_ was healed before letting the boy leave to find his own path. How can he be so stupid to not take the fact that the scars might reopen into consideration?

After calming down, he had never been gladder that most of his bandmates are out and their maknae is sleeping like a baby he is in his room. He creaks the door open, seeing Felix stroking the fluff of dark grey, eyes staring at the sleeping boy sadly.

"Felix?" but Felix made no move to show that he heard him.

"So, is this how you guys felt?" he suddenly asked, eyes never prying off their guest.

"What do you mean?" he didn't dare to look at his leader as he replied

"That night, when I tried to...... _do the same thing_. Is this unexplainable fear, sadness, Helplessness? Like you just wanna blame yourself for not being more observant, or that if only you cared more...."

Bang Chan sat next to him and pull the younger Australian into a hug. Soon faint sobbing blend in with the soft sound of chest rising and falling. "Yes, it is" was all he could answer

 He caresses the other's face which was buried deep into his chest to muffle the sobs as to not wake up the sleeping figure.

"He's...he's _so light_.... I feel like......I'm holding a piece of paper hyung......when I pull him back......he just looks at me expressionless......his eyes were so so _dead_ like death was all there is in his mind....... And he suddenly starts crying and begging me to _throw him off_......or **_just kill him_** then and there......it was so terrifying........." Felix rants and mumbles, Chan silently listens through it all.

"This wasn't the first time.........this is actually his fourth attempt if he hadn't made any other after leaving JYP that is..." Felix grips onto Chan's sweater even tighter. "So that's why...."

"hmm?" Felix had stop crying, which is a good sign? "You were the only one that immediately regained your sanity and kept your cool that day. I supposed you've been through and seen something like that before and probably much worse than what happened to me, and it's him?"

Chan could feel his own tears coming.

"That doesn't mean I don't feel that horrible feeling all the same" Then there was silent, soon the boy in him embrace fell asleep as well. He laid Felix next to the other.

Taking a breath to prepare himself for the gruesome sight he's about to see, Chan gently tug up their guest's sleeve and shirt.

He flinched at the sight of it, scars of all sorts, cuts long like streams that are deep as they can go. Burns and bruises that blooms all over the bony figure in blue, purple and green like some sort of twisted flower garden.

Felix was right, the boy is practically a skeleton, a cute skeleton but an unhealthy and broken inside skeleton that is.

That made Chan's blood boil, had his bandmates not made sure he eats? Even so, how come anyone wouldn't notice how freaking paper thin this boy is.

But a thought stuck him like lightning, _did they.... even care at all?_

Knowing the younger, he's always leaves all sorts of hints, that was his way of asking for help and those hints can get pretty darn obvious, thing like leaving his razor in plain sight or not washing his face after crying.

Chan is sure to have _a word_ with the leader after clearing things up in this side first.

He couldn't do this alone, even back then, there's always _someone_ to help him and in this situation, he knew the one person he not just should but must inform. He rummages around the top of the drawers till he found his phone

Chan didn't realize he was holding his breath until the phone is next to his ear ringing.

 

_"Hello, Chan oppa! Wow it's been a while since you last called me!"_

_"Somi, I need you here"_

_"What? Why? Something bad happened?"_

_"It's **him** , Felix saved him from his fourth attempt"_

_"Already in the elevator, I'm there in a few seconds."_

_"Somi......why...just why does this-"_

_"Christopher Bang, you are not going to start that right now, or ever. No one's at fault, I'm at the door let me in"_

 

Somi, distressed smudge all over her face, and still in a sort of modelling outfit, resists the urge to barge in the room. The girl was in the middle of a photoshoot for a magazine but once she received the call, _fuck the photoshoot and magazine, her best friend attempted suicide for god's sake!!_

She walks into room and saw the state her best friend is in. She knew it was the worst mistake she ever made in her life when they let him go, and the anxiety plus fear that doubled more and more when he joined that dammed hell hole show.

But somehow, she feels sick of herself at the moment.

Somi just feel _so used_ to the situation, like once her eyes scanned that he's breathing and alive, most of the worry fades. The factor may had been that she's seen him like this not once, not twice but thrice in her life.

And on each attempt, she was the heroin. But this time? She wasn't there. She didn't even know _what's going on_

"Tell Felix, I owe him my life" she muttered.

"I will, let's get to work patching these up first. I wouldn't dare do it alone" Chan all but muttered. "It's not fair.... it's like the world just wants him to be miserable" The two sighs, Chan detached Felix from the boy and lay him on another bed.

"I have a feeling he'll be very attached to him" Chan says. "Not that it's something I don't approve of"

Somi shut her eyes when the bruises get too ugly, it was amazing how they were able to treat each wound without waking him up. "Daehwi......I'm so sorry this had to happen to you again"

_

Somi has her hands covering Seungmin's mouth to keep the boy from waking up the two cuddling sleeping figures in his shared room with his squealing.

Chan never explained how on earth Daehwi ended up there, and they understand their leader's action well enough to not question it, plus they were excited to have Daehwi at their dorms.

Even so, they knew something terrible had happened, Chan and Somi's faces plus the dried tears on Felix's cheeks just proves it.

"You guys probably want to know what happened.... but I reall-" Jisung immediately cuts him off, "NO, if it's something you think we shouldn't know, then we don't want to know"

But it wasn't like that, they had to know

Chan knew that but after what he saw on Daehwi's body and his hands covered with Daehwi's blood just now, how can he? "Hyung, it's fine. We don't need to know" Minho added.

"He tried to suicide, Felix saved him" _there_ , the word is out.

And the atmosphere dropped cold, Chanbin broke the silence with a sob, he wasn't as close to Daehwi like Chan and Somi or Jisung but he can't deny that Daehwi is considered _'Someone-precious-that-he'll-protect'_.

Jeongin tries hard to hold back his own tears, flashes of his hyung from months ago reappeared in his mind. With all his courage Woojin muttered a low quiet almost inaudible _"How?"_

"Gash his arms to lose blood and......tried to jump off a 5 storey building, and from how asleep he is, I bet he took sleeping pills too. Felix was there so yeah......" An alarmed hand grabbed Chan's arm.

" _Felix was there?_ As in on top of a _5 storey building_? He went there _alone_?"

Chan let Jisung's words sink in before gasping loudly himself. The Aussie had been so caught up with Daehwi that the idea of why the hell is his own suicide survivor bandmate was there in the first place completely slips his mind.

Yes, he was told that the building was where he and BamBam used to secretly sneak and hang out at and after Felix's arrival he decides to share the place with the younger but was given a strict rule of _'No coming here unless you're with someone'_

"He couldn't have tried again too right?" Hyunjin all but tries to shake off the thought of Felix doing it again. "I know that place and so does he, we used to hang out there but I always told him he can't go there alone...." Somi who had been silent the whole time finally spoke up.

"I called some of the Twice unnies to take care of him since you guys have practice in a few minutes, maybe let Felix stay with him, he still seems very shaken from the shock. Chan, call Got7. We have a certain dorm to visit and a bone to pick with Daehwi's supposedly responsible members"

"Actually, before that let's meet JYP PD-nim first. I've got a request to make" Chan wasn't exactly sure about it, but he has high hopes the PD would let him. He wanted to protect Daehwi who used to be a part of the JYP family, and once a family will always be family.

The door got banged loudly, Woojin rush to open it and 9 girls plus 7 boys march in worried, distressed, horrified, you name it.

Jihyo especially looked like she had been crying, "We heard what happen, my goodness our sweet little Hwi. Where is he now?" Seungmin shows them his room. "Jihyo, please watch over Felix too....... just to be sure..." Chan calls out to the other leader.

"How could they do this to him? How can anyone even have thought of doing anything like this to Daehwi?!" Jackson exclaims.

Somi had a demon face on "I don't know but we're about to find out, and I'm sure neither of us are going to like it one bit"

_

Yoon Jisung is mentally done with these kids! It is enough that he needs to take care of 10 literal children in grown adult's body but said children also makes a huge mess in every darn room, broke one of the kitchen stools and currently one of them is nowhere to be found since the past 6 hours.

He knew that Daehwi likes to go out on his own, most likely because of the tension that never seems to fade between them.

All of them, especially the maknae line never truly accepted Daehwi as part of Wanna One in their early days, pettiness over how the final line-up turned out to be as most of them wanted Jonghyun or Samuel or Seonho to debut with them but instead they get Daehwi.

For the first few months, he admits he himself didn't particularly like Daehwi so most of the hyungs would ignore the boy and pretend he's invisible.

The maknae line however openly shows their hate towards him with nasty and mean remarks on his singing, dancing and composing skills and sometimes pushing him during practices so that he'll mess up.

Over more time, they grew up, got over and become more sensible towards the idea.

He was guilty for letting that negative side controlled him, he knew they hurt Daehwi. But neither did Jisung or the rest of Wanna One knew just how deep did they stab Daehwi.

Even after all the fuss, they just feel it's too awkward to make up with him, so up until now they stopped all the bullying and just treats him normally. Read: Pretend said person doesn't exist

But Daehwi didn't understand, he thought they were finally tired of him, the thought of not only the hyung line but maknae line ignoring him as well scared him.

He could endure all the bullying if it meant it's the only way he'll know they acknowledge his existence, he rather gets hurt and exist in everyone's eyes as an object to be hate upon rather than everyone else pretending he didn't exist.

But Lee Daehwi is only human, a weak minded broken human.

He's bound to break, he's going to lose hope.

And all the times from when he's four, his dad left him and to the bullies at school and the time he started self-harm to the day he tried to run in front of a speeding truck only to have Somi jumping in and pushing them both to safety when they're both nine.

He got taken away from Korea to his aunt and uncle at twelve, he was alone because no one wanted to even go near him for being Asian and tried to hang himself when Somi comes for a visit which again Somi stopped him.

Then he comes back to Korea at thirteen, stayed with relatives who also gives him no damn fucks and he entered JYP.

That's when his whole life turned around, everyone and legit every single living being in that company gave him what only Somi could've given him all his life.

And yet through the battle, he still chose to give up. But instead of seeing the only one pair of hands that belonged to his best friend helping him, he sees multiple pairs now, helping him out of worry and care......he starts to truly heal.

Lee Daehwi starts smiling the smile that he lost when he's four years old, he laughs without faking and he's able to eat without needing to throw it all up right after. He learned what it feels like to be in a real family.

Of course, all good things must come to an end. He was unsure when JYP had suggested he joins another company since there are no plans of debuting a group anytime soon.

He thought he could finally face the cruelty of the world on his own but boi was he wrong, Brand New Music is his old hellhole life all over again.

No trainee likerd or wanted to speak to him, each assuming Daehwi is some snob trainee from a Big3 company that got kicked out after a monthly evaluation. And the hate doubled more and more when he was chosen to enter Produce 101 Season 2, trainees there burned with jealousy at him.

The loud banging on the door is ticking off Minhyun, "UGHH!!! Can one of you lazy asses get the door already?!"

Guanling went and open it, "OH MY GAWD, HYUNGSSS!!" he was startle to see Sunbaes and hoobaes alike at their door.

"Ahh hyung-nims, sorry our dorm is a bit-"

But Somi grab Jisung's shirt collar and slam the older male at the wall, eyes raging with fury

"Which one of you asshats fucked things up with Daehwi? Or was it all of you?"


	2. Chapter 2

Terrified was a mammoth understatement for the leader of Wanna One when the previous winner of Produce held him by the hem of his white collar with his back pressed harshly against the wall.

Guanling and Jihoon stood at the doorway, too stunned to move while Minhyun is ready to pry the girl off their eldest.

Daniel was out on his schedule along with Seongwoo and Sungwoon, Jaehwan is cooped up in his room with headphones blaring music to hear the commotion from his room, Jinyoung crept nearer to Minhyun.

Woojin eyes the 8 figures at their door, when Daehwi's name was mention, he hadn't realized he stiffs at it.

"Somi, let him go. We're all mad-okay, we're all fucking furious but really, just let him go"

Jackson tried to slowly pull Somi away from what looks like a pale Jisung who looked like someone drained all his blood.

"What was that about? All of you have no rights to just barge in-" Jihoon starts to argue because the scene before angered him

"SHUT UP!! The only ones with no rights to talk like you're all innocent here is YOU GUYS!!" Somi barks back, Bang Chan sighs as he knew things aren't going to end well if he doesn't calm down the heat.

Jinyoung and Yugyeom steps forward and pull back Somi before the girl actually gives Jihoon a flying kick, Jaebum nods towards Chan, signalling him to talk.

"Excuse her, I'm Bang Chan as you know, leader of Stray Kids. Aside from Somi's question's earlier, may I ask that....do you know where Daehwi is at the moment?"

Jisung having recovered from his shock becomes wary, because he sure as hell didn't know where they boy ran off to.

"Why would you need to know? He's none of your business" this time it was Jinyoung and Jisung prays to all known deities that the small head and wink boy would just shut up.

"So, none of you know where he is?" Mark asks, surprised at how careless they were about a member of their team, more even an underage member.

"He w-went out a while ago, he al-ways does that......" Jisung tried answering, but the sudden fear from the confrontation was getting to him.

"Look, if you wanna meet him, just ask for his number, not come and act all high and mighty just because some of you are our sunbaes. Ugh, that brat is always causing us problems! With us or not!!" Jihoon all but exclaims.

"The least he could do is not be troublesome now that we stopped picking on him" Jinyoung continues.

And that was the last straw, because a hard fist comes in contact with Jihoon's gut, the younger boy stumble back and clutch his insides. Minhyun who had been silence the whole time, jumps into action, red sirens flaring in his mind as he helps Jihoon.

Jinyoung already grabbing his phone, seconds away from dialling their managers and bodyguards. Even Yugyeom and Got7 Jinyoung rushes to see if Jihoon was okay.

Amongst all the mess, everyone immediately freezes when a sob was emitted from the hitter. Jinyoung's fingers couldn't press the buttons for some reason.

Bang Chan wasn't a violent type of person, he almost never resorts into using violence. But when he hears them talking about his precious fragile Daehwi like that, _he lost it_.

It happens so fast, almost out of unfamiliar reflex he never knew he had that even after the action, he himself was stunned. His minds echoes with their words, _why? Why would they think as such of him?_

And there he was, gripping his head with tears that continues to drip endlessly accompanied by choked sobs.

"Why do all of you hate him so much?!?"

"Why...What.... Why the fuck are you crying?!?!" Jinyoung screams at him, the guy just punched Jihoon!!

Somi would give Jinyoung a punch herself if it weren't for Jackson murmuring for her to calm herself before matters becomes worse.

"Because I'm a fucking idiot!! I let him go even though he clearly couldn't just yet, I let all this happen to him. If I had stopped him years ago, he would be fine right now!! If I had stopped him, he won't join that hellhole of a show or meet any of you jerks!! I'm fucking pissed cuz I let this all happened. And YOU!!"

He points a single finger at Woojin who bows his head in shame.

"I TRUSTED YOU!! HOW COULD YOU?!? Yeah, I get it, you don't exactly know what's with him back then but you for one knew what kind of a person Daehwi is!!"

Woojin stood frozen, he couldn't answer that. "We don't _hate him_......" Minhyun interfered, "We just don't like him........and I myself will admit the reason is very immature and stupid.....but we've been treating him better now" it's not like the boys didn't know they were in the wrong, but they honestly feel like they're trying somehow to fix it.

"If that's the case, then _why did he tried to kill himself?"_

Jaebum's words cause the whole dorm to grown quiet, Jisung especially.

"If you guys were improving your relationship with him, why did he suddenly revert back to self-harm, why did he tried to throw himself of a building? We know Daehwi, he's horrible at hiding his feelings when it becomes too extreme. If you cared, if he had mattered to any of you at all, you will notice, but look here, you didn't. That says a lot about you guys don't you think?"

Neither Jihoon nor Jinyoung utter anything anymore, Guanling however was confused, he couldn't properly understand Jaebum's words.

Woojin feels his blood run colder than ice, Minhyun is still letting his words sink in while Jisung couldn't process any other thought than _'he tried to kill himself, he tried to kill himself, he tried to kill himself'_

"You....you're j-j-joking right.....he c-couldn't possibly...." Jisung can barely just voice out his words, "I-Is he...?" Woojin didn't want to say the word out.

"Lucky for you guys, his member saved him." Somi's phone buzzed. Nayeon's ID lit up her phone screen. She answers the call but puts it on speaker.

 

_"Somi, I'm just gonna give you a brief status update. We were changing his bandage when we realized he's too warm, and Felix as well. They both have fever but Daehwi's is higher"_

_*harsh coughing*_

_"NO, pl-ease, I can't l-leave him"_

_"Please Felix you're going to get worse! Sana help me!!"_

_"Um so Daehwi kinda woke up a few minutes ago, he's very weak and couldn't really move or talk probably due to blood loss. But he seemed very stressed out and his fever keeps worsening so we're bringing him to the hospital. I'll send you his room la-"_

_"HOLY SHIT!! FELIX!! Call the others!! Get him off the floor!!"_

_"OH MY GOD!! Felix fainted!!"_

 

"Nayeon?!!" Somi screams into her phone

"That's it we're outta here!!" she exclaims and goes for the door. "Can you guys get Daehwi's stuff? I..I I n-need to know i-if Felix-" Mark pats Chan's shoulder.

"Of course, you go ahead." And the two are already out of the door. "What Daehwi stuff?" Jihoon asks, "He'll move in with Stray Kids" Jackson answers.

"Why?! And you can't just do that! He's a Wanna One member and-" his words are cut short with Got7 Jinyoung shoving the agreement letter between two company CEOs.

"So, why don't you guys make our job easier and show us to his room?" but Jisung was adamant about it, "No, I won't let you, he's my bandmate and _MY_ responsibility" he isn't going to let them take Daehwi away because no matter how much they disliked him, it didn't feel right.

"You can't take him away from us!!" Guanling who Jinyoung had whispered to him of the situation interjects.

"Why the sudden care? We though you wanted to get rid of him and you Yoon Jisung-sshi, if he's your responsibility then you haven't been doing such a good job at it. With everything that just happened, why would we trust that you won't let this happen again?" the leader of Got7 maybe knew he's chewing them out a little too harshly but what's needed to be said has to be said.

"Third room in the corridor, you don't really need to search for anything. I was wondering why did he packed all his things.....wished I asked..."

Woojin says, eyes not meeting the seven hyungs. "Woojin!" but he snaps his head at the caller, "Hyung you can't deny that they have every right to take Daehwi away. We had our chance, and we fucked that up. Now we face the consequences"

_

Daehwi pull his gaze away from the mirror as soon as the music came to a halt, "Alright boys, take five!"

The dance instructor voice echoes around the room through the mic, he drags his disgusting sweaty self to a corner and chug down a bottle of water. It was cold and hot at the same time and it's making his head fuzzy.

He looks over to the other side of the room, the members are chatting amongst themselves and joking around. He sighs, trying to ignore the stabbing pain inside as the loneliness clinging onto him drives him nuts

 _Idiot, that's what you are, so dumb and useless, so much better off dead_.

He tries to meet their eyes, searching for someone who would come to him, even if it means to throw insults and criticize him.

_No one cares attention whore, are you even worth of their time? Do you deserve to even be with them? No, cuz you're just a waste of space!!_

He laughs at himself, how pathetic can he really be. Daniel wasn't with them, he left earlier prior to his crammed schedule. Woojin, how he always wished Woojin would just notice him but the boy pretends that Daehwi is invisible.

_Why are you still here you worthless piece of shit? They don't want you here!! You're dragging them down with you with every step you take you stupid pile of burden!!_

He clutches his abdomen, feeling his artwork from the previous night, he presses hard and was sure they would had reopened because the pain that follows wash away all the stinging in his chest and head. He stares into the mirror in front of him, looking straight at himself in the eye

_'Just one more day to go......and it'll all be over'_

_

Boomerang was just released a few hours ago, the gang are out celebrating except Daehwi. They didn't bother asking, it's the same cycle every comeback.

He's been monitoring the comment section for a while, searching for any that's about him. But there isn't any, no matter how down he scrolled not a single comment was about him. It was mostly Daniel and Jihoon being hot, Ong and Jinyoung serving visuals or Minhyun and Jaehwan's voice or Guanling not having lines.

There're a few of Jisung, Woojin and Sungwoon

But none of him.

Daehwi shuts the laptop screen and curls up, does wannables pretends he didn't exist too? Does no one really want him to be where he is now? Had it been a huge mistake that he finished as third? Does he even matter to the group?

_Took you long enough to realize, wow you are really that dumb are you? Those who voted for you back then probably regretted to ever support you, Wake up Daehwi!! Just face it, NO ONE WANTS YOU ALIVE!!_

But he couldn't blame them, it was true after all, he wasn't and will never be good enough. Tomorrow, he'll end this once and for all. Daehwi pushed the knife deeper that night, Minhyun is going to yell about his cleaning cloths disappearing.

A broken giggle emits from the boy, shaking in the bathroom, in a bloody mess. Everything ends tomorrow, and this time, he'll make sure of it. Because this time, no one is going to save him, no one will be here to save him.

_

"Hyung, I'm leaving" _and don't worry, you'll be so happy after this because I'm not coming back_

He wanted to say but didn't. He clawed and scratch on his cuts, the wounds bleeding out again. With his black hoodie, he slips out knowing well the older didn't heard him.

He packed up all his things in a few trunks and bags and left them by his bed, the least he could do was to make it easier for them to dispose him from their lives.

He swallow a few pills as he goes, letting himself lose his sense of reality.

He just continue to pace down the streets like a drunk person. Lucky or maybe not for him, no one recognize the Wanna One member limping down the street.

He hadn't realized his feet brought him to a flight of stairs, the door at the very top opens to a view of the blue sky.

_Wahh.....so pretty....._

it was such a lovely sight that he just heads towards it, wanting to be closer to it.

Just as he was about to walk off the edge of the building, "DAEHWI!!!" the scream followed by a pair of arms pulling him down.

They fall back together, at this point Daehwi's conscious had slipped away and his body went limp in Felix's embrace.

"Daehwi!!! Daehwi!! Oh god, w-wake up!!" his mouth stutter in English, his Korean forgotten to the back of his mind.

He sees the faint patches of crimson, and it took all he got to push down the bile that crawled up his throat. "P-please....ho-hold on!!" He hoist the boy up, covering him as much as he could.

He was just hanging around there, it brought him memories from predebut times when Chan would sneak out with him to enjoy the cold night air with BamBam.

Never he imagined to see someone try to kill himself right in front of his eyes, it made his blood run cold and he couldn't believe that this was him a few months back. This is what he used to be

Right now, he should focus on getting Daehwi outta here and to his dorm.

_'Hold on Daehwi...'_


	3. Chapter 3

Silence wasn't really what he was expecting when he steps foot into their usually chaotic dorm, despite barely even existing there, Daniel could already tell something was terribly wrong.

"Did someone died or something?" Seongwoo joked, while Sungwoon is already to the dining room. It's dinner time when they got back and they are starving.

He finds it creepy to see everyone at the table, mouth unmoving, utensils only picking the food on their plates. Jihoon and Jinyoung didn't bother looking up, Woojin wasn't even there and Jisung could be seen in the kitchen doing something.

"Welcome back, how's your day?" Minhyun greets them, for once without a smile.

Jaehwan looks at them, eyes screaming _'I don't know what happened but HELP ME'_

"Annoying, and EXHAUSTING!!" Seongwoo shouts and takes a seat next to Jinyoung. Sungwoon and Daniel awkwardly sits in between Minhyun, something felt off.

Jisung emerges from the kitchen, places a plate each in front of the three and retreats back to the kitchen, all the while in complete silence.

"Woojin!!! Get down here or no dinner!!" Jaehwan shouts, "Not eating" he said back.

Sungwoon silently mouth _'What the hell happened?'_ at Jaehwan which the older just shakes his head violently.

"Jihoonie......did something happened?" Daniel asked the younger, "Sort of...I guess.... look, just don't ask me" this surprised him, Dorm Jihoon is normal but moody Jihoon is a rare sight.

"Minhyun why is everyone so......down?" Seongwoo who finally acknowledged the clearly something is wrong atmosphere speaks up.

"Reasons......" Daniel hadn't realized but he's been counting heads out of habit, two were missing but they knew where Woojin was which leaves....... He froze.

Okay, if he wasn't worried before, he is now.

"Where's Daehwi?" at the mention of the name itself, the three who were picking their food went still, a crash was heard from the kitchen.

"Jisung hyung?!"

Jaehwan and Sungwoon rush to the kitchen, they brought back a fear stricken Jisung with glassy eyes. How was he supposed to explain this to Daniel?

To Daniel who had been the only one to actually care for Daehwi?

All the times they've been petty and immature, Daniel tried reaching out to Daehwi.

Subtle actions like leaving him water bottles and constantly scolding the other maknae line to back off of Daehwi without the boy knowing. Unlike them, Daniel accepted Daehwi, he gave him a chance. But Daniel as everyone knows is a busier than a bee person, he's barely even with them.

"Calm down Jisung hyung, just breathe" Jaehwan tried to help the leader

"Where. Is. Daehwi?" Daniel didn't like what the situation is leading to.

"Not now Daniel, later-" but for the first time ever he cuts the other off, Minhyun was stunned.

"Something is obviously wrong and it's definitely got to do with him! Where is he?! Daehwi?! Daehwi!!"

"JUST SHUT UP!! He's no longer staying with us!! He's with Stray Kids" Jinyoung spat, "What? Why?" but Jinyoung couldn't continue.

"I'm with him, how do I not know of this?" Jaehwan butt in. "I'll explain later......please Daniel, not now....... for Jisung's sake" Minhyun tried reasoning.

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry......I'm so sorry Daniel" Jisung rambles on and on.

"Don't give me that bullshit!! You guys did something and one of you are going to tell me what the fuck exactly happened when-" he was cut off by Woojin's rough voice.

"We fucked up big time, his JYP friends take him away from us" Daniel calmed down but something inside was telling him that wasn't all.

"Oh really? So, he finally snapped and complained to the company?" Seongwoo remarks, Daniel isn't that close to Daehwi but knows well enough that wasn't even an option the younger would consider.

"No, he......... tried to....... end his life.... but they saved him and assume that he's better off with them" The centre could feel his heart stop beating.

"What?"

.

.

.

 

"Daniel calm down!!"

Minhyun frantically tries to reason with the younger rapper, but he wasn't listening.

"They never told us what hospital he's in and probably doesn't want us near Da-" But Daniel was already out of the door.

"I don't care, I'll search every damn hospital if I need to!" and the dorm door slam shut. Of course, they had to get Seongwoo, Jaehwan and Woojin to drag Daniel's protesting and angry self back to their dorms.

"I can't believe this......I should've noticed" he mumbled, anger died down. "We all should've, not just you or Jisung hyung. We're all at fault" Woojin's phone starts to ring

"It's Jackson sunbae......he wants to face time me" they all look at Woojin's phone. "Pick it up"

 

_The screen was shaking a little wildly but as soon as it was steady they could make out a hospital bed with Daehwi under the covers, eyes fluttering weakly. A few shadows and figures could be seen, "I'm sorry......I'm so sorry......." He was crying into what looks like Chan's chest with Somi hugging him._

_"I'm sorry ........" he kept repeating it over and over._

 

"Daehwi......." Jihoon mumbled, he never seen him in such a state. It was horrifying because they could see just exactly how bad they've broken him.

 

_Next to Chan was Felix with his hands secured tightly around one of Daehwi's, "It's okay......you're trying.... we all know you are......it's okay Daehwi.... you're okay....."_

_Somi's whispers were picked up. "No......I'm so troublesome......nobody wants me around......everything is so much better without me......I'm nothing......always have.... always been......I'm sorry"_

 

Every word stabs, to think this was under all that sunshine he put up. He had been hiding this self-loathing side from the eyes of the world so freaking well that the very thought of it haunts them.

"No.....You....you are not......it was never......" Jaehwan couldn't put his mouth to work. Jihoon and Jinyoung head their heads down in shame.

 

_"You're not....... don't say that......you're not nothing....... we all want you....... we cared Daehwi...we need you.....please don't ever.....say that" the shushed sobs were more audible now._

_" _It hurts........I can't do it.......no more.....I just can't......" Felix leaps into hugging him. "You can....... we'll all be here with you....no one is leaving you ever gain.........we're here for you...I'm here for you"__

_"My Wanna One hyungs........do they know?" this time a clear fear in his voice, "Yes, but-" but Daehwi panicked_

_"N-no......they can't! They must never!! I'm already such a burden......if they knew about this then...then......they'll hate me even more! I'll be a much heavier anchor to them, I'm going to ruin everything! And practice! What time is it? Dance practice starts-Oh no, I'm in so much trouble! I have-" Felix and Chan did their best to hold him without hurting him_.

_"I keep failing them....... I can't just keep being this way I'm dragging my entire group-" The camera was moved to another angle, it moved till it was outside of the ward._

_"You would think he'll be happy to be alive? To think he still acknowledge you fuckers as his hyungs. Look under his bed, there's something you might want to watch" Jackson said and the line was cut off._

Every soul in that dorm cried hard, they've made such a terrible mistake. Daniel pick himself up and did as Jackson told them to. He found a camcorder and connects it to the screen before playing it.

 

_"Hello it's me, Lee Daehwi and this is my first entry as a Wanna One member, I hope things are better now. I can't wait, it's my first official debut with a group of my own! I wonder if it's like being at JYP again, Daehwi out!"_

__"Um, hi? Daehwi again. Um...it's just that......did I do something wrong? Why are they like this? I guess I'm not trying hard enough? Yeah, I think that's it. But its just so.....hard....."_ _

____This time the screen shakes, "I'm sorry, oh god please.....I'm so sorry Somi....Chan hyung.....Jisung hyung......I tried, I really did" and the camera titled revealing an arm filled with barcodes of red. "I swear I tried, but I'm such a fuck up....I'm sorry"_ _ _ _

_"Hello, it's me......it's been a while......honestly, why did I even bother giving myself a chance? When I'm going to throw away everything in just one night?" Daehwi buries his face into his arms, his bloody mess of an arm. "Wanna One hyungs........I'm sorry it was me who got voted......So, in 10 days in honour of my 9 hyungs plus 1 dongseng........I'll erase my existence. When I'm no longer here, I hope everyone live a much better life......I'll make sure of it, no one is going to save me this time. I love you hyungs and you maknae. I wish you guys had gotten the person you wanted, I'm sorry it was me."_

"Stop, I had enough" Jinyoung says

"You had enough? YOU HAD ENOUGH?! HATE TO TELL YOU BUT THIS WAS YOUR DOING?!? ACTUALLY, THIS WAS EVERY ONE OF YOU ASSHOLE'S FAULT!! DON'T FUCKING SAY YOU HAD ENOUGH!!" Daniel fired at him.

"Daniel, we get that you're mad but what-"

"DON'T YOU BUT ME, YOU'RE THE LEADER. AND I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT A DARN GOOD JOB YOU DID-" he stopped when a hand came in contact with his face, Seongwoo slapped him.

"Daniel, pissed or not that's not a way to talk to Jisung hyung. He's your _hyung_ and leader, and he knows his wrongdoings and you don't need to rub it in his face" Sungwoon commented.

Daniel, still in anger stomp out of the dorm. The door again was slam shut so loud they're going to get noise complaints.

"This kid......."

"I don't blame him....."

"hyung want me to go get him?"

"hyung?"

"Jisung hyung?"

***thud***

"JISUNG HYUNG!!!!"

 


	4. Chapter 4

The ride back to their dorm was accompanied by Woojin's soft sweet humming, Woojin, Chan, Felix, Daehwi, Jisung and Changbin rode the first car while the rest took a second car.

Jisung and Changbin are at the back, asleep.

Daehwi was also out as light, he's nestled perfectly on Felix's lap with the other's one arm secured tightly around his waist and the other gently stroking his head, the two oldest of Stray Kids sat on each side.

Felix felt so attached to the boy in his arms, right in that moment Daehwi looked so peaceful.

It kind of reminds him of the events from a few months ago, he remembered being in the same position as he is now, of course with the roles reversed.

He remembered Seungmin who very much acted the way he is now towards Daehwi, he remembered Seungmin cradling his weak self back then in the car in this very position.

The way his roommate refuses to let him out of sight, but it was expected of him to act in such a manner.

Seungmin was the one who found out, he was the one who rushed to warn his hyungs, he was the reason Felix was still alive.

Chan couldn't take his eyes of the two, partly because uwu they're so cute and he's trying to figure out how were they going to do this exactly.

Daehwi is still apparently bound to his Produce contract, which means roughly around 6 to 7 more months left for him needing to stick around with his bandmates.

He was a given a week off but after that it was back to practices, he's glad both groups are done with comeback promotions.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when he hears someone snapping pictures, Woojin held his phone with the softest expression ever.

"They're so adorable and precious _uwu~"_ he cooed, Chan was baffled. He looked back at the pair and definitely can relate to what Woojin was feeling.

Felix fell asleep as well, and now it looks like the two are cuddling each other while sleeping. Chan had a huge grin, and turned away, muffling squeals into his jacket.

 

_JYP_GotTwiceKids_

Chan: I demand pictures, Sharing is caring

Jeongin: What pictures

Jihyo: You kids otw back?

Woojin: _*Sends pictures*_ you're welcome

Jackson: Why you had to go and do that, I have a weak heart

BamBam: I can literally hear Twice screaming from my room

Hyunjin: I am Not? More like I AM SOFT

Yugyeom: Jinyoung hyung busting an uwu is a big fat mood

Mina: Please send daily pictures of these cuties

Woojin: Comes with a price

Sana: A signed album of ours

Woojin: Tempting

Momo: plus, next comeback's spoilers

Woojin: Deal

And the group chat just keeps exploding, "Woojin what the heck?" but the other just smiles, "Felix will thank me later."

_

Daniel ran till he reached the elevator, his tears wouldn't stop flowing and he could feel the guilt gushing in for yelling at Jisung.

That, was a mistake and wrong of him no matter how poorly he had treated Daehwi. With his panic attacks backgrounds- _oh fuck, fuck fuck fuck FUCK_

How could he forget?!? Now he feels like a jerk, in a way he kinda is at the moment. He burst through the door, no one. But there is light at the corridor and he could tell it's coming from Jisung, him and Seongwoo's shared room.

Minhyun is trying to calm three panicking maknaes with Sungwoon's help. Seongwoo is on the phone while Jaehwan is fanning the weakly breathing leader on the bed, Woojin is trying to get Jisung's attention to help ease his panic attack.

"Hyung!!"

Daniel takes over Woojin's spot, he's been through helping Jisung with his panic attacks. Although they glared, they know Daniel was the only one that could help their leader.

"Hyung I'm sorry, please forgive me. I didn't mean any of it" Jihoon, Jinyoung and Guanling were taken to their rooms.

"Niel...Niel......."

"Yes hyung I'm here"

"Niel......how a-are...... we going t-to m-make up w-with him?"

"I......don't know hyung....."

_

Chan smiles, they've progressed more with Daehwi's condition far quicker than he had expected.

Amidst all the challenges like making sure he eats (Chan shudders as remembers how dreadful it was to see Daehwi barfing out anything he eat due to not being used to food that tasted more than plain cardboard) or the times he relapses of his self-harm ethics.

He has three days to go with them and back to practice with Wanna One he will go, although the small boy doesn't show it, but he's terrified to go back.

He's told a lot of things, them being sad and Jisung even protested when they asked him to be moved. But his mind and more importantly his heart just can't seem to believe it, after all that happened, how could he?

He spends the days watching stray Kids at their dance and vocal practices, helping them in any way he's able to.

He spends a whole afternoon giving the dance line weird choreo ideas which they actually agreed to use, some of it. He helped Jeongin and Seungmin with sharpening their vocal techniques and even had a Sing-off with Woojin (Which ended in a tie).

Felix has a new Korean language teacher to help him study and Jisung is ready to renamed their pre-debut trio as 4RACHA with how much Daehwi is contributing to an album that they're working on.

Occasionally other groups, artists or even staffs would stop by to say hello or give him a hug, Daehwi admits, he missed being here, he missed this family.

With most of his strength regain, they tried to teach him some of their dances, with pretty much both Australians against the idea.

"I bet I can learn it in two tries" Daehwi proclaims, Hyunjin at his side with an adoring smile.

"I feel like he's going to get it right, right away" Seungmin adds. "Daehwi.... you shouldn't be, our dances are really intense and-" but before the deep voiced boy could say more.

Minho and picked Daehwi up and ran away.

"That's dangerous! Put him down!!" Chan exclaims when Minho zoomed past him. Daehwi laughed and laugh, Chan feels his heart melt at that, Daehwi was so happy with them.

The leader was able to rally everyone up in one room before starting the practice, Daehwi sat in the back, giving each boy a thumbs up with his reflecting in the mirror.

When they're going through Voices for the 5th time, they were already too exhausted, so exhausted that when the song switched to District 9, they didn't notice that there were 10 of them doing the choreo.

It was only till the chorus that they noticed Daehwi dancing with them, grace yet powerful with each step he executes. He watched them more than needed to know where to squeeze in the formation and soon looked natural within them.

Jisung let him slide in during his rapping part, but boy didn't expect the younger vocalist to rap his parts out while dancing and perfectly too with his own sense of style.

As the last note fade and they stood in position, every head turns to Daehwi and praised him.

"Ahh, but I messed up a lot" he admits, listing out everything he did wrong but went unnoticed. Felix hugs Daehwi, although they were supposedly seen as a year apart, Daehwi is actually only a mere few months younger than him yet almost towering over him and Chan.

The boys crowd around Daehwi, giving him all the praises, cuddles and kisses they believe he deserved.

Bang Chan proudly looks at them, this picture, his 8 kids and one more with each other.

He can't help but love this image, Daehwi as part of their team. It felt complete, perfect, _meant to be_.

He wonders, what if JYP was wrong to transfer him? What if..... **what if**....

Daehwi's destiny had been to _be with them_ all along.

Just then the practice room door opened, three clearly unwanted figures walked in.

How dare they show their faces

Daehwi paled, his irises quiver in fear. He latched on to Felix, and the others saw it.

Now almost every member of Stray Kids is protectively standing near the two. Chan had to calm himself down, anger had already bubbled up quite high when they appeared but seeing his Daehwi reacted that way.

He wanted to snap someone's head off.

"Daehwi......"

But Daehwi just starts shaking, Felix is more than ready to pick him up and bust him out of here any time, any second.

"Daehwi...please...we're sorry......we're so sorry"

Jisung was crying, Daniel was crying, _Jihoon_

**_Park Fucking Jihoon_ **

 The leader of all the bullying is _freaking crying_ , asking _him_ for _forgiveness_.

Chan's gaze softens, but Felix kept a firm a glare. "Daehwi...please come back to us....to me......I cared...I should've done more to show you that...I'm sorry I didn't.....We're all willing to make it up to you....please...." Daniel pleaded.

"I......forgive you"

Collective gasps of shock chorus around the room. "But I won't go back.....Wanna One isn't where _I belonged_ " Daniel's heart broke, they lost him, they truly lost him.

Daehwi emerged from Felix's back, he held Chan's hand and Felix's too. Gathering his courage he looks at them dead in the eye.

"Stray Kids.....JYP.......they're _my family_ , I realized that now. They're my family to me and I'm _never leaving them again_ "

_

Jinyoung wants to laugh at himself, of course he wouldn't want to come back.

What is he even expecting? When broken heart leader returned with puffy eyes along with their centre and aegyo boy, why was he not surprised?

Maybe because he would've done the same if he had been Daehwi.

For Jisung, it hurt. _So bad._

The way the younger cowers in fear at the very sight of them, how he looked so darn shocked when they apologized. And it pains him, seeing how he clung to the other leader and the other boy, clearly trusting them more than he trusted his own bandmates.

He thought to himself, it should've been _him_ , it should've been _them_. Why did he do it? Why?

He replays every moment he did Daehwi dirty.

_

_"Hyung.......did you see my sweater?"_

_"Daehwi, you should at least try to not lose your things"_

_

_Daehwi sat alone across the practice room, eyes blank in deep thoughts_

" _Stop it already, we won't pity you dammit"_

_He didn't stop them, in fact he secretly smiles inside_

" _Knock it off Jihoon, leave him alon-be. Just leave him be"_

_Jisung rolled his eyes, why do you even care Daniel?_

_

_"Daehwi get up we're leaving in 5!!"_

_Daehwi obeys without a word_

_"Hyung he hasn't had breakfast yet, why didn't you wake him?"_

_"Daniel he's 17, he should know better than to expect someone to take care of him all the time"_

_But he treated Jaehwan, Sungwoon and the rest of hyung line just like the maknaes_

_

_Daehwi volunteered to do the dishes, despite not even there eating with them_

_"You know this doesn't change the fact, I still think Samuel or Seonho should've make it instead of you right?"_

_But it was the first time Daehwi actually answered him off camera, and the first time he was surprised and may have felt guilty_

___

_**"I know"** _

_

And days goes on, each of them had begun to feel the empty spot Daehwi had left.

It was weird for Jaehwan, Seongwoo and Minhyun to go in their working room but not see Daehwi stressing himself out at the keyboard.

It feels off for Sungwoon and Jinyoung every time they stayed in their room, knowing a part of the drawers are empty and the bed on the top bunk remained untouched.

Jisung didn't realize he constantly prepares one portion extra every now and then only to realize, he's not there anymore, he was late to do the things he should've done.

Daniel didn't like it when he return to the dorms but not see the younger huddled by himself on the couch with earphones in while reading something on his phone.

It was weird when they learn a new dance and there's no one getting it right immediately because it had always been Daehwi.

Jihoon just keep to himself, his eyes always look at where Daehwi always sat on his own, far away from them.

He walks over, sat down and looks at where the group usually hangs. Jihoon feels goosebumps as he could almost feel the loneliness, the feeling of being excluded, _unwanted_

_**unneeded** _

He could feel his tears spilling, is this how he felt? If it were Jihoon, he'll go mad, batshit mad.

He couldn't stay this way for more than a minute. It felt too _cold_ , too _lonely_ , and to think Daehwi went through it for nearly a year without a word.

What a huge asshole he had been

And he remembers, the way Daehwi looked at him with the most fear, as if he's afraid he might hit him.

How he clung to that other boy as if his life had depended on him, then they heard his stories, his past attempts. How could they hurt-No, they broke him, teared him apart mercilessly.

"Daehwi.... forgive me.....I'm so sorry" he sobs and sobs but no one came, the room was empty.

Is this how he felt? No, probably much much worse.

To have no one to rely on, to believe no one cared and that oneself wasn't worth or deserving of care. To cry and sob so hard yet there'll be no one to give you a hand.

Maybe today he'll just learn what Lee Daehwi feels

How Lee Daehwi lives

How he was able to endure all this suffocating shit yet pull a smile brighter than the sun for the fans,

How he was able to keep everything bottled up for so long because Jihoon knows, he for one, couldn't.

Today Park Jihoon learns what's it like to be ¼ of who Lee Daehwi is

One questions remains in his mind, even only subtly experiencing what the younger went through

"How'd you do it? To feel like you're _dying_ but still looked fine. _Just how did you do it.....?"_


	5. Chapter 5

"You okay mate?" Chan asks the boy, it may have seen like nothing but he knows, for Daehwi that moment itself took a huge toll on him.

"Yeah......I guess so" he mumbled, smile not reaching his eyes. "Hyung, do you mind if I bring him out for a walk a bit?" Felix asks, Daehwi already by his side, hands around Felix's.

"Sure, just don't be too long and keep out of sight. Don't want fans mobbing you out of nowhere" he pats Daehwi's head with a smile, the leader watches as the two giggled and left.

"They're so cute" Seungmin cooed, "Do you think he likes Daehwi?" Jisung suggested.

"Pretty sure he's whipped. Who's in to play cupid?" Chan takes the lead before they could manifest further ideas. "Oi! Leave them be, no one is playing cupid"

Hyunjin snorts "Who needs a cupid when you're a way better archer, I'll get them toge-"

"LET'S CONTINUE FOR A BIT WITHOUT SHALL WE??"

_

The two boys sprint out of the building and to a nearby park, they march up an ice cream truck that's seems to be waiting for them. The lady didn't recognize them thankfully, "What can I get for you two sweethearts?" she wears a warm smile.

"Hmmm......Chocolate for the win!!" The blond boy exclaims, Felix uwu-ed in his head at how childlike Daehwi was.

"I'll have Cookies 'n' cream please" Felix slides the money for both treats to the lady before Daehwi could even react.

"Hey!" He playfully punches the elder. The two starts to walk down the deserted park, although with no other human in sight it bears a friendly comforting atmosphere. They sat on a bench to finish their ice cream

"Do I.... really need to go back?" Daehwi suddenly shoots a question at the orange haired.

The question structed him, he had entirely forgotten that Daehwi was supposed to join his bandmates again in a few days, it felt like his whole mind had programmed him into thinking Daehwi was a part of his own group.

"I wish you didn't had to, I lik-We all like having you around" he quickly corrected himself, faint shade of pink on his cheeks.

"Me too......" the other replies, and silently goes back to eating his ice cream. It bugs Felix, Daehwi seems to be hiding something. He uses his hand and cupped Daehwi's face

"What's on your mind? I know something is bothering you, please tell......." Daehwi smiles and sighs.

"It's just that....... what I said just now......I can't help but feel like......was it too harsh? Was that really what I should say to them?.......I feel like I've hurt them somehow.........It wasn't their-"

"Stop right there Hwi" Felix concerned voice silence him.

He was baffled, how could Daehwi be worried that he hurt them when those guys basically push him into making him almost losing his life.

It was unbelievable how kind hearted he is, the way he thinks of others even those who had badly scarred him above his own wellbeing. Felix liked and admired that about him.

"I'm sorry but, I have to say this. They deserve it, they did a lot of horrible things so they're going to reap what they sow. You weren't harsh at all, if anything that was too soft. And if you feel as though you hurt them, well they hurt you, and Karma is a bitch that loves you. Whatever happened between you and them, it will and can never ever be your fault. It may or may not be theirs, but definitely not you"

Daehwi looks like he's about to cry, on instinct he leaped onto Felix. "Thank you......I never knew I needed to hear that." Felix returns the embrace. "Anything for you Hwi"

"WAH! My ice cream!!"

"My shirt!! Felix hyung!! come back here!!!"

They run around in circles, "Seriously hyung?!" he uses a tissue to wipe away the smeared treat on his shirt. "Daehwi! come here!" Felix pulls him to a swing. 

Daehwi wasted no time and seated himself on it. The elder began pushing him, it was nice to hear Daehwi joyful laughter filling the solitude atmosphere.  

"Higher hyung!!" he chants, it was adorable. Just like a pure innocent child at play. Felix noticed how Daehwi can sometimes be really childlike. Whining when he wants something, cuddly and clingy especially with those who are older than him.

It made him realized just how much he lost his time as a child, someone like him who could be considered was forced to 'grow up' earlier than others.

Maybe that's why he shows these childish characteristics when he's around people he trust, because he couldn't be that way when he was a child.

"Hyung? Felix hyung?" Daehwi snaps a finger in front of him, snapping him out of trance. "You spaced out on me?!" Daehwi pouts and whine.

"Aww, I'm sorry baby. Wanna play on the slide?" It didn't even bothered the younger when he had used the nickname, instead he looked happy and skips ahead.

"YES!! Hwi loves the slide!!" Without realizing Felix discovered something new about the other boy. 

_

"Hey Chan!"

"Somi! What's up? you don't usually call me"

"I just remembered something, did you ever try to get Daehwi to regress? It did helped a lot back then"

"Well, I think he did"

"What do you mean? Wait, as in, regressed without being aware of it?"

"Yeah, but don't worry you know he controls well even if he's in headspace and from what I've seen it's between 6 or 7 years old so no one noticed anything off"

"I hope so, who are the others that knows about this again?"

"Me, you, Got7, Twice, Jisung and Changbin. I'll only tell the others if they catch on, and if Daehwi lets me of course"

"You're such a mom sometimes"

"I ain't call Bangmom for no reason"

_

Chan hadn't meant to wake up, he just did. The skies are still pitch dark, he looks over to the clock that shows 3:35 a.m. seriously? On a free day?

So, he decides to make himself some tea and probably whack his brain out for some lyrics. He steps out into the corridor, it was dark but he could still find his way around well. He didn't switch on any lights but proceeds to the kitchen.

He paused his actions when his ears picked up sound, whimpering. Silently he follows to where it came from, his guess was proven when he saw a bundle of yellow and blue on the couch, head buried into his hugged legs.

Slowly he sat next to the younger and wrap him in his embrace, the other figure stiffs for a second before melting into returning the hug.

"Hyung I'm scared....I don't want to go back, I don't want to meet them again....I'm so scared! What if they hate me even more? What if they insult me even worse than before? What if I spiral back again? I can't take that pain hyung.... even worse, they'll get me to talk, or confront me...I can't imagine how I'll stay sane through that hyung"

He keeps a firm grip on Daehwi, hugging the boy as close as he can to calm him down. "I'm so scared hyung...I'm so freaking scared that it's so stupid..." he lets Daehwi pour out all his thoughts, listening to every word all the while holding back his own tears, they scarred him so badly.

"Shhh...hyung's here.... hyung will protect you.....we'll never let any of that happen Daehwi. Never. You're going to be okay"

"Dada........want...M-Mama....."

Chan feels his whole-body tense, it's been quite long since Daehwi last called him that. Chan looks at the boy, eyes red and puffy from crying, yet his eyes reflect innocence. Daehwi then puts his thumb into his mouth, sucking on it while still gripping onto Chan.

"hwi..wa-want...mama" if Daehwi didn't just had an anxiety attack that literally pushed him into regressing, Chan would've squeal and squish his cheeks.

Instead, he tries to get up to get his phone. Daehwi then cries, "N-No! Don't weave hwi! Dada!" Panicked that little Daehwi might wake the others, he carries Daehwi up and rocks the boy to sooth him.

Once Daehwi stopped crying, he reached for his phone to call the said 'Mama'

 

"Somi, uh we have a situation"

_"This better be about Daehwi or I'm putting the phone down"_

"There'll be no other reason for me to call you, he's regressed"

_"Oh? Do I have to come?"_

"More like need to, he's asking for you"

_"Be there in a sec-"_

"Actually, I'll go there. The others might wake up here and I don't want that. And I don't think he's aware at all. In fact, he's progressly getting younger, maybe even to a non-verbal age"

_"Okay, I still got all his stuff. Just come right over"_

 

Chan carefully covers the little with a jacket, he exits the dorm as quietly as he could and makes his way to Somi's dorm.

Somi although undebut actually got a whole three-room dorm all to herself. Daehwi was squirming a lot and it's a miracle they got there without bumping in to anyone. Somi immediently takes Daehwi away from Chan.

"Shhh.... mama's here...." She lulled the boy, she frowned at Chan.

"You let him suck his whole hand?" Chan sheepishly smiled. Somi motions for him to take the stuff she laid on the table, there's all sorts of things for littles.

Chan picked a green pacifier with the letters 'Baby Boy' on it, he hands it over to Somi who placed it into Daehwi's mouth with ease.

"Chan this is probably the youngest he's ever been, 7 or 9 months really...." She says, "We better change him and get him to sleep" the elder male says.

Somi takes him to one of the vacant room, he puts Daehwi on the bed and walks out, letting Chan dressed him up in loose pyjamas with animal prints and even reminded Chan to put on diapers just in case.

While waiting, she preps a bottle of milk and pick out some stuffies. When she returns, Chan is cradling Daehwi in his arms while singing a song as Daehwi giggled and yawn, she cooed at them.

Seeing Somi, he tucks Daehwi into bed and lets Somi held the bottle to Daehwi's lips.

The boy drinks the milk, and Somi place the plushies on each of his side. Since Daehwi is too little to hold the bottle on his own, Somi had to hold it for him.

Chan ruffles his hair, singing an old lullaby he knew that he used to sing to Daehwi back during JYP trainee days.

Once finish, Daehwi eyes were almost closed. Somi gave him the previous pacifier, and a few seconds later he's sound asleep. The two caregivers quietly pace out the room, smiling fondly at their little as they do.

"Wow, I really forgotten how nice it is to take care of him" Chan says, sitting on the couch while Somi hands him a cup of tea.

"I know, right? Hold on" she disappears into her room and emerged back with a book. "Oh my gosh, Somi you still kept it?"

"Why wouldn't I? This is a priceless momentum, I love to go through it from time to time" She says letting Chan hold the book.

Cut out letters glued on the cover reads out 'Daehwi's Family' and lots of stickers and hearts. Inside were pictures from years ago, their moments with little Daehwi and big Daehwi. Daehwi's old photo scrapbook that little him made.

"Still remember Nayeon's face when he wouldn't stop crying?"

"Hah! That one time he drew your face with makeup"

"Or that time we build a pillow fort and you had to play monster"

"Oh yeah, he puked on Jackson once too"

"Isn't this that day we bake cookies but yours burned?"

"Shut up Chan, I was a great mom, still am I might add" She proclaims, "What about me?" he asks, eyebrows raised.

"You're a lame dad" and burst into laughter. "Wifey how could you do this to me? After all we've done for our son?" Chan dramatically says a hand covering his face.

"Where do I sign on that divorce paper husband?" She snaps back, making Chan puts a hand on his heart with an exaggerated face.

"That marriage joke is so old, you're a cringey old man Chan" she says, "Not even gonna argue on that matter, now we better shut it or we'll wake the baby"

Somi as much as she protested, admit that she needs to sleep. She knows Chan probably needs the rest more than her but the elder was stubborn and she does feel herself drooping asleep already. "Go to bed, I'll watch him" he insists, reluctantly she did.

Chan makes his way back to Daehwi's room, he smiles at the boy who is sleeping soundly with a pacifier in his mouth while snuggling the stuff bunny.

It was 4:45 in the morning, he decided to kill some time on his phone.

_

Somi peeked in the room, it's 6:30 a.m. and she's checking on the boys after waking up. Chan was still on his phone, "Oh, you're up" he whispered.

"I'll make breakfast" but before she could leave, Chan leap up from his seat and pulls her out of the room. "No way, I'm making breakfast. You watch him, call me when he's awake" he had war flashbacks of the last time Somi prepared something for them.

"Hey! I'm not that hopeless anymore!" The female says, "Sure you are mate, Imma go make breakkie while you watch the baby" he sends her a smirk and disappears into the kitchen.

"Your accent still sucks!!" She exclaims, and returns into the room.

Daehwi still remained asleep, Somi sat on the bed gently, careful not to fright him awake. She caresses his face, admiring the peaceful look he had on his face. "You're so precious to all of us......always know that hwi..." she whispers and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead.

In the kitchen, Bang Chan decided to whipped up some pancakes for them, he remembered how Daehwi loved those with Nutella.

When he's done, he plates Daehwi's using the colourful plates he found on the table from Daehwi's Little Stash. He was about to spread the Nutella when Somi came in carrying a drowsy Daehwi.

"Aww, is my little cupcake awake~?" he singsongs, a clear grin on his face. Daehwi rubs his eyes, yawning while smiling

"Dada made tantakes?" he asks looking at the table with excitement. "Yup, come on now, you can have as much as you like. But you have to finish it okay?" Daehwi nods his head excitedly.

Somi giggled placing the boy on a chair, Daehwi immediately reaches for one with Nutella spread and munch it happily.

The two caregivers watch the little making a mess on his face, smudged with chocolate and bits of pancake, they could only coo at the adorableness.

"Hwi done!" he says showing his empty but messy plate, he also got some of the food on his pyjamas.

"Good job, we're proud of you. Mama will clean up, go wash up with dada" Somi says, Daehwi chirps an _'okay!'_ to her and turns to make grabby hands at Chan.

Chan uwu-ed at him, picks him up and takes him back to his room. Bathing Daehwi was easy, actually handling Daehwi in general was easy because Daehwi's obedience even shows in his Little self.

The clock shows 7:15 a.m. , Chan sighs because his members will be up soon and he's not at the dorms along with Daehwi. After bathing and Changing, Daehwi is doing some doodling and colouring with Somi in the living room.

For Chan and Somi, they have specific roles as caregivers.

Chan always do the more 'take caring' part, prepare Daehwi's food, bathing, dressing, changing diapers, making sure he has his paci and stuffies.

Somi on the other hand, was more on the 'affection' part, she's the one to sooth Daehwi when he's upset most of the time, plays with him, fuss over him.

They balance out each other in a way.

Somi noticed Daehwi suddenly stopped colouring, "Baby is there something wrong?" she quickly moves near him.

Daehwi's cheeks burn red in embarrassment, he takes out the pacifier in his mouth "S-somi.....I'm big again..." Chan came in just time. "Okay, then. How are you feeling?" she asks her best friend.

"Great, thanks for you know......taking care of me......I know it's exhausting at times" But the two laughs, "Nonsense! We love taking care of you" Chan proclaims.

"Ahhh really, what did I ever do to deserve you guys..." he says, leaning into Somi as she hugs him. "By being with us Hwi, you held on strongly and stayed with us"

"Come on you two! It's too early for this emo-ness, and you people call me the old one!"


	6. Chapter 6

Daehwi feels his heartbeat quicken its pace, the door in front of him feels like it's glaring at him. Chan and Felix squeeze his hand in their grip.

"You can do this, don't be scared, we're here" the younger aussie assured him. "It's just for 4 hours, right? And I can go back to your dorms again for another 2 hours before seeing them again for an interview right?" The two nods, giving him encouraging looks.

Daehwi takes a deep breath, he lets go of Felix's hand and push open the door. Inside were 10 faces he hadn't seen for nearly a week, each had a different reaction to his arrival.

But none compared to what a certain centre's face that was glowing with joy of seeing him.

"Daehwi......" He calls out, walking towards him, wanting to hug him, to hold him so close that they'll never lose him again.

But Daehwi backed away, a look of hurt flash across Daniel's face.

It wasn't because Daehwi had rejected him, but because Daehwi backed away from him while staring at him with fear stricken eyes, they weaver with hesitation and anxiety. Daniel hates it, he hates it because Daehwi was _afraid_ of him

Daehwi is afraid of **them**.

Felix protectively puts an arm around Daehwi, "No funny business with him" he snarls at them.

Chan kept a composed facial, though he was unsure if it was okay to leave Daehwi with them at all, not when Daehwi is like this. He turns to face the younger .

"You'll be okay, if anything happens hyung is one call button away and I'll be here in the next minute-scratch that, we'll be there in the next second!" he reminds Daehwi and kissed him on his forehead.

Felix too gave Daehwi a hug and kiss on the cheek, "You're strong, and you're not alone okay? If they ever try hurting you again, they won't live to tell the tale. Not on my watch" he claims to Daehwi.

"I'll hold on to those words hyung" Daehwi replies with a chuckle. The two left after telling him Hyunjin and Woojin will pick him up later, much to their dismay of wanting to stay longer they needed to go.

They watch awestruck at how Daehwi was around those two, a pang of shame wash over them. "Hello again to you guys, I know I'm not missed, sorry that I'm back"

But they do miss him, they want him back.

"So, lets learn the choreography"

After all that happened, they were expecting Daehwi to be out of it at first, only for them to jaw drop at how he proves himself to be flawless doing the choreography.

Daehwi had received a video of it and practiced on his own with Stray Kids, so all that's left was only the matter of adjusting his synchronization with the others and formation position.

He knew every swing and jump, twists and turns, within the first few run through they were already perfectly executing their newest song 'Light' choreography. And with each step, there's that face he wears, the one that captivates his fans all across the globe.

The dance wasn't actually a priority as it won't be released till a while later but the company wanted them to learn it early, after running through Light, Boomerang, I Promise You and some other songs for 2 hours the dance instructor lets them take five.

Daniel watches Daehwi's retreating figure, moving slowly before slumping down at his usual post, the corner furthest from them.

As if he'll let the boy be alone again, he grabs a bottle and march right up to him and seated himself beside the younger. Daehwi with his eyes closed and breath panting for air didn't realized Daniel's presence until he hears the other's own breathless pants.

He stiffs, inching a bit to the other side. Why was he so afraid? He didn't understand himself.

He keeps getting these sick feeling in the pit of his stomach every time they try to get so much as a step closer to him, he wishes he knew where did the fear came from.

Actually, maybe he does know, he just doesn't want to admit it.

"Hey, you slay the choreo so naturally, it took me nearly a week to do that move towards the end" Daniel comments, a sincere smile plastered across his face. "uh....... thanks......" He didn't know how to respond; how do you respond? It was so easy with Felix, Hyunjin, Chan, Twice, Got7 and others but with them

what does he even say?

"We missed you, we really do" Daehwi didn't like this, he hates talking about this because it made him feel guilty.

_Where were you when they were miserable? Some bandmate you are but you caused this too right? Isn't that right Lee Daehwi? You know all this is your fault right?_

It was too early, too soon to succumb again. He had to stay strong, at least for a little longer.

"No, you're the blind one asshole!" Jihoon's loud shout had startle him from his thoughts.

He and Jinyoung seems to be in one of their heated unpopular opinion argument, "You look ridiculous in polka dots! Have you seen yourself?" Jinyoung spats back, "I look good in anything! You're just petty and jealous" the other says with a smirk.

"Daehwi, what do you think? who's right? Me or him?" Jinyoung all but suddenly turned to Daehwi.

Daehwi felt like he's nailed to the ground, decisions, out of all the things they could've thrown at him. It just had to be decisions.

A debate blares in his mind, should he take Jinyoung's side or Jihoon's? One of them will be very upset with him either way or worse, he'll cause them a grudge. Why are they suddenly like this?

It's making him uncomfortable in all sorts of ways.

Jisung leaps up and gives each of the two a smack on the head, "You two stop that" he says. "Daehwi?" Jaehwan voices, Daehwi again startled by the call of his name jumped a bit in surprise.

Jaehwan never calls him by his name off camera, he never really acknowledges his existence to do so. It shook him even more when Guanling took the spot on his other side.

Daehwi's mind is in a jumble, why are they suddenly so comfortable with him? As if these past few months never happened? He could see their faces turning into worry, why?

Why are they suddenly caring? Wasn't there no camera around?

They're not being filmed. His JYP family aren't here too so why are they keeping up this act? He wanted them to stop, stop trying to fool him, to play and toy with his feelings. He wanted nothing more than to just run away from them.

Daehwi thought of playing along, you know, going with the flow and act out his own part of the play. But he couldn't, it used to be so easy, effortless even.

Now he couldn't put himself together to just act along with them. Let things fall back to how it used to be, but why can't he? Almost as if he lost every ability to play in this 'play pretend' game he believed that they're in.

Minhyun crouch in front of him, gently he reaches for Daehwi's violently shaking hands. By just a slight contact, Daehwi flinched. He gets up and push past Minhyun, and stood a good distant away from them.

His heart was beating so fast, and it just got ten times more suffocating. His eyes widen at what he just did, making him fall back on his bum.

"Daehwi, wait you're-" Jisung tries to reason with the younger. He knows an anxiety attack when he sees one.

"NO!! DON'T COME NEAR ME!!" finally he screams, the tears streaming out as he clutches on his whole body. He's breathing but it didn't feel like it, it felt like he was dying.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry" the words pouring out his mouth like a chant, Daniel couldn't take this anymore.

He got up and was about to pull Daehwi into a hug when Daehwi said something that sends a piercing arrow through his heart.

And he stopped, because he knows it's no use, they couldn't help him, he wouldn't let them. He wholeheartly doesn't trust them no more.

"Please s-top this, this whole game of ac-acting. I'm tired, I c-can't play this anymore. I'm so sick of be-being played! I don't care if you-you're gonna insult me or trash me, I won't even tell o-on you guys. I swear I won't. Just please, I'll take anything you want to throw at me but this faking game. P-please"

There was a pregnant silence, ever since finding out about this mess it seems like their brains had been functioning slower than ever because everything that spills out Daehwi's mouth always lagged in their mind and needed more time to process.

Jinyoung pace forward, he had to hold in his tears as he does, he always thought insults and hate comments would stung him the most. But hearing his own bandmate that he had mistreated, begging and pleading for them to stop their 'act' and just go back to hurting him, how he couldn't let himself to believe they wanted to change for him.

He never thought these kinds of words would pierce his whole being a trillion times harder than any hate or insults.

Daehwi didn't bothered putting up an act anymore, he simply close his eyes, head hung low as he waits for whatever that's coming. They already knew just how messed up he is, he lost all reason to cover up.

"Daehwi...please.....c-can you look at me?"

Daehwi flinched, that is a very hard thing to do. But the least he could do was do as he's told, right? Daehwi takes a whole minute just so he could muster enough gut to look at Jinyoung, when he does he could see the other male is doing his very best to not just burst into tears.

"I'm sorry-"

"No, you're not. You don't have to be" Stop it, why can't they just stop it?!

"Daehwi, WE WERE WRONG!" The sudden outburst caused him to back away, eyes back to the floor.

Jinyoung realizes his mistake, stutters. Jaehwan, done with Jinyoung's incapability yanks the younger back. Daniel still stood unmoving as the rest chose to remain as they are.

"Daehwi hear us out, please. Just give us another chance Daehwi, we can prove to you that we're going to make things right. We're not lying or acting, we truly regretted what we did. Please, give us a second chance"

Daehwi gives Jaehwan a chuckle, but it didn't sound happy nor real. It was sadistic "I gave myself three including now, _four fucking chances_. Look how that turned out"

"And what do you mean that you regretted? Make things right? You never done anything wrong, I shouldn't have won, I shouldn't have even entered. I make songs that sounded the same, my vocals are a joke, my dancing is ridiculous, I'm ugly as fuck, I screw things up every darn time and I've only been a burden that brought bad luck to this group. I'm a pathetic being right? Couldn't even do this world a favour and kill himself even if he tried." He didn't even cry this time, there's no more tear left to shed.

"And you know what's the best part? I don't want it to stop. God forbid me to have a peaceful life, but I don't even know if that's what I want. I don't know if I want to smile happily ever again, I don't know why I'm so darn scared of getting better. It hurts, it hurts like hell itself but thinking about waking one day and not feeling this way? It feels so wrong. So don't even be fucking sorry when you did nothing wrong, I deserve that shit. Hell! I wanted that shit. Sorry that you guys ended up with this fucked up kid, I get why you all hate me, trust me when I say, I hate me too"

When he's done ranting, the atmosphere drops colder. Daehwi looks away from them, "I'm sorry" a hand gently takes his's.

He was brought to stand in front of the mirror, they each lining up to form a single file line in front of the mirror.

"You know what we see here?" Daniel says pointing at Daehwi figure in the middle.

"A Glitch"

"I see someone so beautiful, I get jealous so I hate him"

"he was so talented, my envy blinded me"

"I was surprised at his kindness, I lied to myself that he's not"

"When he dances, I couldn't look elsewhere, I blamed him for being too good"

"He was so humble, but I pretended he wasn't"

"When I cried for getting a place, he cried for others who didn't make it"

"He was so strong smiling for others, I misunderstood him for over priding himself"

"He's so selfless, working the hardest, but I played blind"

"He's always doing his best, I wouldn't accept it because of pettiness"

"He fought a long hard battle on his own, if it were me, I would've given up. But he's still here, standing, staying, holding on for everyone he cares"

Daehwi cried, why are they saying such things at him?

"I-I'm n-not a-any of t-th-those things, yo-you're lying!"

And he felt immediate warmth around him, they embraced him in a hug. "You are, no matter what your mind tells you, no matter what you want to believe, we're sorry we never told you the truth. But that's who you are Daehwi, a beautiful amazingly talented selfless and humble person" Jisung lulled in his ear.

"I don't know how to believe in those words, I may never learn to believe those words"

"That's why we'll be here every step of the way, we cared Daehwi, we're fools, assholes, you name it back then but we'll make it right. But we need you to give us another chance Daehwi" Minhyun softly says.

A long paused accompanied by hitched breaths and sobs.

"I'll try"

_

Their choreographer lets them off a half an hour early, Daehwi had called his hyungs to pick him up. They head down to the entrance together, this time with a more light atmosphere. Daehwi's face lit up seeing Woojin, Hyunjin and Felix waiting for him. He leaps into Hyunjin's arms, snuggling into the elder as he does. Woojin takes a picture before ruffling the smaller boy's hair.

"Wow, I don't get anything?" Felix pouted, Daehwi giggled he jumps at Felix. And to everyone's shock, he presses his lips against Felix's, making the Australian's face turn beet red.

Hyunjin takes Daehwi away from Felix the very next second, carrying the boy easily in his arms. "Daehwi, you're adorable and all but _what was that?"_

Felix is still recovering from the very fact THE LEE DAEHWI _KISSED HIM_

"Hyung's got kissable lips, plus Minho hyung said kissing can be platonic too" Hyunjin cooed and cuddle him tighter, Daehwi is his baby from here thereof and no one is telling him otherwise, Jeongin can find someone else.

"Me and Minho are going to need to talk about what he's teaching the kid" Woojin all but sighed, and picks up Daehwi's bag.

"Felix, you good?" by now he's just breathing in and out as steadily as he could while gripping on his pulse. "she'll be right" he didn't even realize he spoke in his native tongue.

"Since Chan says that a lot, I'm just gonna assume you meant the same. To the car boys, move it!" Woojin shooed them away, "Bye hyungs!" Daehwi turns to give them a last call.

The three Stray Kids members smiled at it.

Although they were slightly jealous at how comfortable Daehwi is with his Stray Kids friends, they're glad at least they're making a little progress. Even if it were to be baby steps, they'll get somewhere eventually.

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~Spring Breeze Era~

"Daehwi? Are you okay?" Jihoon kneels next to the younger, Daehwi launch himself in Jihoon's embrace. "I'm going to miss us, I .....I don't want us to be separated!" he sobs, almost like the whole dorm had telepathy because everyone was there in an instant.

"I'm gonna miss you guys so much...." he sobs on. "We will too hwi" Guanling says hugging his hyung by months.

"Can time stop?" he asks, even though he knows it's not possible. "I'm sorry hwi, if any of us could we'll definitely stop time for you. But look on the bright side, you'll be debuting into Stray Kids as their tenth member right?" Minhyun reassured him, although he too is sad with the nearing end.

"I bet they can't wait to have you in the team, they better treat you well or they'll catch these hands" Woojin says smugly, showing his fists.

"If they pull a Wanna One hell pt 2 on you, just call okay?" Jaehwan adds, the past memories of pain and foolishness only remained to be joked about from time to time.  

"I doubt that" he mumbled, "Do you want your paci?"Jisung suddenly asks, Jihoon is already looking for it. "No it's okay, I don't feel little."

Telling them about his age regressor status was also one of the hardest things he's done but they accept him (and Daehwi may thinks sometimes) way too much

"Bet you're boyfriend is thrilled for you to be with them"

"Oh please, he keeps reminding me every 2 minutes."

"Whipped gay culture" Sungwoon snorts, "Aren't we all though?" Daniel chimes in slinging an arm around Jihoon.

"I still can't believe Jisung hyung approved!" Jinyoung exclaims. Daehwi rolled his eyes, "You think? I can't believe Chan and Somi allowed. They're practically my parents, little and big. Plus, the whole population of JYP building ships us"

"Speak of the devil! He's at the door" Guanling says, Daehwi stood up and twirls in front of his members. "So, how do I look?"

"Cute"

"Drop dead gorgeous"

"Adorable"

"Beautiful"

"uwu"

"When did you grew up so fast?"

"Pretty"

"Amazing sweetie"

"Ethereal  definition of beauty at it's finest"

"LOL Felix is gonna die"

Daehwi laughs at their comments, he truly changed. he was better, and he's accepting that he's better. he wasn't afraid anymore.

He skips to the front door and sure enough when he's in view

Felix melts into a puddle for the umpteenth time that week

"Am I seriously that fabulous lix?"

"Yes you are and if you dare forget it, don't worry, I'll remind you" he softly pecks on Daehwi's lips before taking his hand.

"Have fun on your date lovebirds!! Not too much though!!! Keep it PG!!" The others cheered while the couple turns red in embarrassment.

"Who are they? I don't know them, Wanna what?" Daehwi joked, causing them both to burst into laughter.

"Thank you hwi"

"hmm?"

"For holding on strongly for us all"

"I'm glad I did"


End file.
